Colorado gives me a lot of meditative and contemplative time. I am able to be more aware of what is going on around me with friends and family members; and that led me to notice a bit of unhappiness between certain people in my life. I began thinking about arguments and disagreements between those I care about and love. And... yes, I too am not without a dispute with a person.
We all have disagreements. To clash at times with family and friends is a part of life. Whether we simply have a difference of opinion with someone or engage in an argument, disagreements offer an opportunity for us to learn and grow.
One of the most important things we can do when we find ourselves in disagreement with anyone, whether they are close to us or not, is to try to remain calm and to be respectful. When we disagree over something minor, we usually just engage in some playful squabbling. However, when we are discussing something of importance to us, or if we disagree with someone we don't particularly like, it may be difficult to keep from becoming angry and exchanging harsh words. From there, it's all too easy for a disagreement to escalate and become a full blown shouting match.
During any disagreement, it's important to be respectful and let the other person state their opinion. Then listen and really try to hear what the other person is saying. Try to understand not just their words, but their feelings as well. Understanding is more important than agreeing. You may not come to an agreement, but you can agree to disagree and still keep peace.
If a disagreement starts to get heated, take a deep breath and stop talking. Make eye contact and try to find compassion. Chances are, there will be an energy shift and both of you will become calmer and better able to discuss your differences.
We shouldn't however, withdraw from those close to us when they want to discuss issues. As uncomfortable as conflict may be, when we are able to work through disagreements the relationship is strengthened.
Disagreements offer us a chance to become more accepting, loving, people and give others the chance to do the same.